The Theory of Universal Malice

It is my firm belief that the Universe hates me. Pessimistic of me perhaps, but there is ample proof. Oh, certainly it slips up occasionally and lets me have my moments of joy, but I'm pretty sure that's only because it's busy inflicting misery somewhere else. I admit that others suffer far more than I do. In war-torn Eastern European countries, in times of famine in Africa or even in the inner cities here in the States, the Universe doles out punishment far in excess of my own. But when it does spare a moment to remember that I exist and that I may be temporarily feeling pretty darn good about myself, look out! The past few days have been one of those times when the Forces-That-Be realize they've been too easy on me. So, I'm on call at work and getting woken up at 4am by my pager going off (and again at 5am, etc.), I'm sore from starting a new exercise plan, I was out of work Monday with a serious migraine and now I'm pretty sure I'm coming down with something. Yes, I realize I'm whining. My blog, my privilege. But, in the interest of not being too big of a twit, I'll leave it at that and move on.

I'll be the first to admit that the modern world kind of sucks in a lot of little ways (and several big ones, too), but the book I'm currently reading makes me kind of glad I'm living in a reasonably technologically advanced era. It's called "Dies the Fire" by S.M. Stirling and it tells the story of a global cataclysm that renders advanced technology useless. Electricity is no longer a slave to the whims of Man. Gunpowder and high explosives are rendered inert. Yes, the set up is a little hokey, but the brutal fight for survival that follows is graphic enough to make me look around at our comfortable, air-conditioned, food-rich, computer-driven world and sigh in relief. Ironically, some of the main characters in the book are former SCA people. It has been said that should society collapse and technology become scarce, that Scadians would have a field day. We already know how to fight with primitive weapons and many of us have skills that pre-date the onset of modern technology. We have blacksmiths, leather workers, horse trainers, bowyers, etc. But, for most of us, it's a hobby. Something we do in our spare time. Sure, we invest a lot in developing those skills, but it's still not a life or death thing. What if it was? Would we really be able to survive the brutal after-effects of a global breakdown of technology? Some of us would, I'm sure. There may even arise new nations based around strong Scadian warlords in such a setting. But it wouldn't be pretty. The grim reality of such a situation would be rife with famine, disease and human brutality. Many people would die in all kinds of horrific ways. I'd rather not find out if I would be one of them, thank you very much. Still, reading this book, I have to wonder if being thrown into a struggle like that would crush us into dust or bring out a hidden reserve of strength. I have no illusions about my current state of health or my ability to compete with people who are bigger, stronger, better trained and experienced in real combat. The reality of it would be deeply unpleasant for people like me. But the fantasy of somehow becoming a hardened survivor, a cunning, experienced, dangerous denizen of a grim post-apocalyptic wasteland, well, that is somehow darkly attractive. What would we do if our technological cradle were overturned and the thin veil of civilized behavior were torn away? It is an interesting question to ponder. Hopefully, such a thing will remain firmly in the realm of fiction and not something we ever really have to face. It would make our current woes seem petty indeed.